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TheScuSpeaks

Mitch Hedberg is dead

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"alcoholism is a disease, but it's the only one you can get yelled at for having. ‘dammit otto, you are an alcoholic.’ ‘dammit otto, you have lupus.’ one of those two doesn't sound right."

 

:(

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He was one of those comedians that just worked with one-liners. They were damn funny, too

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"PS - this is what a certain part of the alphabet would look like if q and r were eliminated."

 

"sometimes i like to use words that mean the same thing as words i use a lot, but aren't used as much. like, if some asks me if i like cheese sandwiches, i'll say "All-encompassingly!"

 

RIP man... damn...

 

brennan

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My apartment is infested with koala bears. It's the cutest infestation ever. Way better than cockroaches. When I turn on the light, a bunch of koala bears scatter, but I don't want them too. I'm like, "Hey... Hold on fellows... Let me hold one of you, and feed you a leaf." Koala bears are so cute, why do they have to be so far away from me.

 

I used to do drugs. I still do drugs. But I used to, too.

Mitch Hedberg '68-'05

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Mitch Hedberg was like a god to me. I saw him live on the comedy central presents tour, so I'll always have that. All his jokes were so damn funny, I can't even pick a favorite. Damn, I'm gonna miss him. Rest In Peace.

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