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mdawgig

Funniest Cross-Xs (Questions, Answers, etc...)

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*we're running a nontopical queerness aff, they have a counter advocacy that has us sign a petition to get ENDA passed, their role of the ballot is to make the most "actual change" in round*

 

Me: Have you signed this petition?

Him: Well, uh... No

Me: Judges, I'd like to show you a series of images. *goes up to judges and shows them a slideshow of our signatures on the petition, comes back and shows it to him*

Him: *completely speechless*

Me: So who's created the most change here?

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Once I hit a natives team, and didn't really have too many questions to ask.

 

End of cross-x:

 

Me: can you name any of the specific reservations that your plan builds roads to?

Them: well, erm, uh...

 

Lay judge liked it, and I won.

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This round was the best, lol. My partner and I could no longer break at this tournament, so we ran a nietzsche aff. It's like, read 9 extinction scenarios, advocate roads to nowhere, read nietzsche for solvency.
The neg ran a spending T that said we didn't spend any money.
My partner: So you read this T saying we don't spend money correct?

1nc: Yes

Partner: So do these roads just magically appear?
1nc: uhhhhhhhhhhh. We'll concede the T

Also, they ran a states cp
My partner: What is your incentive to the states to kill themselves
Them; We use the same one you use for the federal government

Partner: We don't have to give them incentives. We are the fucking federal government,
The judge was sorta pissed but so worth it

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Not me, but I judged this round:
CX of 1NC

1A: "What's the status quo of your states CP?"
1N: "Oh...um...disconditional"
1A: "What's the net benefit to the CP?"
1N: "Our Oil DA" (They also read politics in the 1NC)
1A: "Ok...on your T, we build trains, how do we not meet T-vehicles?"


 

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Not me, but I judged this round:

CX of 1NC

 

1A: "What's the status quo of your states CP?"

1N: "Oh...um...disconditional"

1A: "What's the net benefit to the CP?"

1N: "Our Oil DA" (They also read politics in the 1NC)

1A: "Ok...on your T, we build trains, how do we not meet T-vehicles?"

 

That's just painful.  Reminds of Gonzaga JV this year(almost everyone was a bumped up novice, so it was their first time w/ K/cps).  I swear to god every aff Cross-X i got asked "So could the states/private sector/anyone else do the plan just as well?"  What do you think I'm going to say?

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second novice round.

Neg: Do you increase palm trees?

Me: Ummm no i dont think so.

Neg: You are very untropical then

Me: (facepalm) is this a real arugement?

Neg: This is my Cx bucko (who says bucko???)

Me: Very well.

 

With next year's topic, I can see this as the joke-face of a real argument.

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 (Partner and I debating novice team that was pulled up, we ran states cp against HSR)

 

(After 1NC)

1AC: So you're saying we should have HSR?

Partner: Yes, but the states should enact the plan.

1AC: No further questions.

 

2AC goes up and talks for 3 minutes on how we just argued the AFF's side for entire 1NC.

we had 3 flow judges, and one of them wrote "are you stupid" on the ballot for the AFF team. 
mfw the judge was their assistant coach
 


 

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(Partner and I debating novice team that was pulled up, we ran states cp against HSR)

 

(After 1NC)

1AC: So you're saying we should have HSR?

Partner: Yes, but the states should enact the plan.

1AC: No further questions.

 

2AC goes up and talks for 3 minutes on how we just argued the AFF's side for entire 1NC.

 

we had 3 flow judges, and one of them wrote "are you stupid" on the ballot for the AFF team.

mfw the judge was their assistant coach

 

 

Why was a coach judging his own team?

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In Novice, at the state tournament, Reading NexGen

1N: Do you truly believe, in your heart, that NexGen is good?

Me:  Yes, I do.

1N: That's great. I commend you for that. No further questions. 

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First round at woodward this year, we hit Port Dredging that somehow lead to the creation of super intelligence that prevented all wars.

Me: So your plan leads to the creation of a super intelligence

1AC: Ya it does

Me: Have you ever seen movies where super intelligent robots take over the Earth?

1AC: Ya a few

Me: Is there any possibility of your plan causing this senario?

1AC: No

Me: Why not?

1AC: Because its a super intelligence 

 

 

in another round we read an impact turn that says human extinction is good because it prevents the production of biotechnology that will eventually destroy the universe and we were debating in a science classroom. 

 

CX of 1NC

Aff: what evidence do you have that says these technologies will be developed?

Me: Well we have the Lee evidence and that poster on the wall that says biotech is the way of the future.

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In Novice, at the state tournament, Reading NexGen

1N: Do you truly believe, in your heart, that NexGen is good?

Me:  Yes, I do.

1N: That's great. I commend you for that. No further questions. 

i don't know why but this just made me laugh my ass off

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At ADA nationals. Debating a Liberty team that normally reads Wilderson, so my partner and I read nuclear fusion (college topic) that had a negative state action mechanism and a warming adv with a racism impact. They decide to go 5 off and case and not read Wilderson. One of their off was the God K.

 

My first CX question: ""Thou shalt remember the sabbath day." So why do students from a Baptist university get to be here on Sunday while our aff should be rejected for being against God?"

The 1N: "You've got me there"

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At ADA nationals. Debating a Liberty team that normally reads Wilderson, so my partner and I read nuclear fusion (college topic) that had a negative state action mechanism and a warming adv with a racism impact. They decide to go 5 off and case and not read Wilderson. One of their off was the God K.

 

My first CX question: ""Thou shalt remember the sabbath day." So why do students from a Baptist university get to be here on Sunday while our aff should be rejected for being against God?"

The 1N: "You've got me there"

Bobbit and Ayodeji? Did you win the round?

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Bobbit and Ayodeji? Did you win the round?

Oh no, it was against one of their other teams. Cheri and Walker.

 

And no, we lost. They went for cap and the judge decided that the dropped "cap not root cause" card with a ton of explanation just wasn't good enough. Shit happens.

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no, we lost. They went for cap and the judge decided that the dropped "cap not root cause" card with a ton of explanation just wasn't good enough. Shit happens.

Has a debater ever said they lost a round without giving an explanation as to how they didn't really lose the round?

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Has a debater ever said they lost a round without giving an explanation as to how they didn't really lose the round?

On occasion, I'm sure

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Us against another circuit team that we were winning so hard against we started running joke evidence 

 

Them: So this Baudrillard card (Try or Die bad), where do you want us to flow it? 

Us: Were gonna drop it anyway so don't bother

 

I guess they didn't believe us because they spent 3 min in the 2NC on it. I'm not about to lie about something that the judge would notice anyway. 

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This was on the space topic, and we were reading a Moon Base Case. Neg ran a space disease solvency turn.

 

CX of the 1NC

Me: How come space disease didn't happen in any of the previous space missions.

 

1NC: Because we had... Spacesuits?

 

Me: Great! So how come we can't use spacesuits in our space program?

 

1NC: Because... they're hard to use.

 

Me: And why are they hard to use?

 

1NC: Because... they're heavy...

 

Me: So we can't use spacesuits, where they were empirically used before, in 1/10th of the gravity on Earth, or in no gravity, because they're too heavy? Do you concede the argument?

 

1NC: ...yes.

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During UIL Districts on the space topic we (neg) ran up against a team running a case about satellites beaming down energy

 

Me: So could these satellites be used for military purposes?
aff: no, the beam only has the power of a microwave

me: so your telling me that the beam being shot down is like a microwave

aff: yes

Me: (pointing to convenient microwave in the room) so since microwaves are apparently harmless you wouldn't mind getting in that for a few minutes would you?

aff: no that would be suicide

Me: I've made my point judge, end of cx.
 

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After 2acNeg team: Do you have evidence that (argument)?Partner: No, this isnt PoFo, you don't need evidence for everything you say.

Was this during the mndi interlab debates? By any chance

 

Im like 89.17% sure this was our debate haha

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Was this during the mndi interlab debates? By any chance

 

Im like 89.17% sure this was our debate haha

It wasn't just interlab debates that I heard this (almost every round)...

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Very first debate I was ever in. Not too sure what was happening. It was the Poverty topic and we were running ELR (employer of last resort)

 

neg- has your plan passed yet

aff- it will if the judge signs the ballot

neg- so it hasn't yet?

aff- no

neg- so your plan is illegal?

aff- no

 

Then they proceeded to talk about how our plan was illegal and how the judge should call the police, they also ran t substantial of which was the real reason we lost to

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Maverick Aff: The rest of cross-x is going to be prep, so you can sit down.

Judge: I'm not okay with that. You're going to have to keep asking questions.

Maverick: Umm... Could you tell me more about the link to politics? 

[furiously typing on computer while saying this]

1N: {explains link}

Maverick: Uh, could you tell me more? 

1N: About what?

Maverick: About the link... To politics...

 

(This was JDI camp tournament semifinals this year. Maverick aff ended up dropping on a 3-0)

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